For over 20 years Sergeant Kaua’s War Academy has been Lahaina’s premiere institute for the study of the combat arts. The Sgt. has taught hundreds how to shoot, strike, and […]
I had planned on thanking you all for turning out last night at the unveiling of our ethnobotanical garden. I was going to explain to you all how important the […]
Fractured Hearts is the leading matching service in Lahaina for lonely survivors, Thrivers, Kanaka, or the recently restored. We’ll help you not only find the person right for you, but […]
Since 1975, Suter, Stine, Burn & Partners (SSB&P) has developed a regional and national presence serving a diverse client base with advice and legal counsel. Since the fracturing of the […]
The tunnels, lava tubes, and storage facilities beneath Lahaina have long been popular places for those with an adventurous spirit to explore. Finding supplies and weapons can be very lucrative […]
There are many legends on the island and many mysterious events everyday, but one of the most recent is the appearance of strangers dressed in the clothing of the old. […]
She says the world ended, that the veils fractured and almost everything is gone. She’s in my head. She tells me her name is Saraphim but I can’t remember mine. […]
For the past 10 years you’ve counted on the Lahaina Merchants Association’s public roasting pits to provide a safe and convenient place to cook large meals for your friends and […]
Living on an island and being so connected to the water, it is no surprise that so many Kanaka legends focus on boats and the sea. We are taught how […]
The Fracture didn’t just destroy much of the old world, it produced a number of new problems for we Kānaka to overcome. Many animals grew large and angry. Water and […]
According to Kānaka legend, there used to be a large farm near Keali’i Gulch. Hana farm was well-known in the area for a number of reasons. It was one of […]
The Kanaka have many sacred areas and revered places on the island, but a few stand out from the others. The Augustinian Cliffs are one such place. Sitting in the […]
In many ways modern Lahaina is a land of contradictions. First-time visitors are often stunned by the natural beauty of the lush valleys and colorful fish of the reefs. The […]
As President of the Lahaina Merchants Association, I’d like to thank my fellow sellers and citizens for making the past year our best and brightest so far. Our Fall initiatives […]
Over 60 years ago my grandfather Buddy began Da Kine Air to serve all of your ventilation and air conditioning needs. Through hard work and professional service Buddy turned Da […]
There are a handful of buildings that survived the devastation of the great fracture. Many like the radio tower, serve as landmarks and offer a reminder of the past. Others […]
The fracture destroyed large swathes of land and a majority of the population, but it wasn’t just lives that were lost. Many of the systems and constructs of society were […]
For over almost 20 years I’ve proudly led this group. When I started, many of us were selling scrounged tools and cans of food in dark alleys. Under my leadership […]
There is no doubt that the fracture changed life as we know it. The collapse of governments, the destruction of buildings in the explosions, and the sickness and famine it […]
To whom it may concern, My name is Gloria Barnaby and I am outraged at what passes for customer service at your company! As a retired school teacher living on […]
The Kānaka’s relationship with technology is a complex one. While they accept the need for science and machinery, most consider the fracture to be a direct result of an unhealthy […]
I’ve been highlighting the Regulators and it’s most important members this week. There have been a number of groups that shaped Lahaina after the fracture, but there’s no doubt that […]
There have been a number of groups and individuals who have impacted the day to day lives of survivors on the island. Few have had as big of an impact […]
There is no shortage of mysterious legends and strange places in Lahaina. Whether it’s a cryptic Hailoha driver patrolling Front Street, a mountain top ghost ship, or an eccentric survivor […]
There have been a number of groups and individuals who have helped make the island livable since the fracture. From science fair kids joining forces with a dance troupe, to […]
Lots of groups had a hand in rebuilding Lahaina and turning parts of it into the paradise it is today after the Veils fractured. Not many of those groups survived. […]
We Kanaka are known for our easy going lifestyle, and taking time to enjoy what nature has provided, but there is one thing we take seriously, our stories. We have […]
The Kanaka believe that everyone is given the same two things when they are born. The world gives you a purpose and your ancestors give you a special skill. As […]
We Kanaka are natural storytellers. We teach our children about the island, our beliefs, and our history through our tales. While these stories cover many topics, the most common theme […]
There are a number of buildings that survived the great accident. The radio tower, the veil station, and the power plant all offer those who survived a reminder of how […]
The Lahaina Merchants Association would like to invite you to the most exciting sporting event on the island, the 46th annual Lahaina Lava Sled Championships. Teams from all over the […]
At the request of program specialist Gary, and against my better judgment, I have been hard at work assessing the feasibility of a menehune domestication program for the Lahaina Merchants […]
Congratulations, you are cordially and secretly invited to the 11th annual Tappers Day Before Christmas Spectapluar! If you’re reading this note you already know how serious we take this event […]
For over 50 years the Lahaina Merchants Association’s weekly auctions have given islanders a place to buy food, water, and the rest of life’s necessities at a reasonable price. Many […]
Saraphim? No, I don’t want you to burn anything in the room, or rub anything on me. I just want the usual treatment. Saraphim….restoration? No! I come here to catch […]
Dear Lahaina Merchants Association We represent the owners of trademark registration no. 11948372 here and in dimension ∃3.81.654729. Widespread use of the Manimal trademark has been made, to the extent […]
Over 95 years ago the cure for thirst was discovered and Manimal was introduced to the public. Perhaps the most recognized brand in the world, Manimal dominated the sports drink […]
The green island couldn’t hold us! We managed to reboot, albeit not in our own bodies oddly, onto Lahaina today. The island is beautiful, but of course we’d rather be […]
Of all the dangers in the forest, the most dangerous might be the green ladies. Whether they are feeding on a family, catching the unwary in the forest, or hunting […]
For years you’ve known Sgt. Kaua’s War Academy as the premiere hand to hand combat academy and school of battle on the island. The academy has deep roots and a […]
For as long as I’ve been responsible for teaching your children I’ve tried to prepare them for life on the island while teaching them the importance of knowing how we […]
Before the fracture a person could get anything they wanted delivered to their home. My grandpa says they could even return it and get their money back if they didn’t […]
Snow may not be the first thing people think about when they think of the island, but the summit of Haleakalā does occasionally get snow, and it’s not unusual for […]
There are a bunch of animals on the island that aren’t native to the land. The first people brought some of them here on purpose like pigs, dogs, and chickens. […]
When the veils fractured everything that people counted on to live their lives was gone. Many of the roads were damaged, there was no internet or electricity, phones wouldn’t work, […]
Everyone has their favorite holiday. Some of my friends like Christmas because they get presents like candy or a new knife. Others like Thanksgiving because of all the different food, […]
There are lots of legends about lost treasures, forgotten food stores, and hidden caches of weapons on the island. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve heard stories about […]
For a long time people celebrated Thanksgiving every year because they didn’t have to worry about having enough food. The first Thanksgiving happened a long, long time ago before people […]
The fracture made a lot of scary things you have to be worried about. Nobody wants to come across a green lady or a group of night marchers, but some […]
An expert is someone who has a special skill or knowledge in a certain area that nobody else has. There are many experts on the island. Some are really good […]
The Kanaka don’t teach their kids in the same way we do here in Pu’u. They use stories. Since they didn’t plan as well as people like my grandpa and […]
Even though many of them are sick from the big accident, the Kānaka are really good hunters and fisherman. They are also great storytellers. They use their stories to help […]
Right after the big accident people like my grandpa had to work hard to find enough food, water, and medicine. It was tough, but they made it. By working together […]
Everyone makes mistakes, and my grandpa says it’s ok to make mistakes as long as you learn from them. One of my favorite stories about learning from your mistakes is […]
The people who first came to the island brought a lot of things with them like food and tools, but they also brought the idea of sacred places. Long ago […]
In the past, before my grandpa and his friends made everything safe on the hill, people would carve tiki idols to help them remember people or stories. Some of the […]
A long time ago there were no Tourist camps to trade with or Night Marchers, Menehune or even Green Ladies in the jungle. Everything worked everywhere not just up here […]
A long time ago when everything still worked and my grandpa was young, there were roads paved with something called asphalt everywhere and most people had cars. If you wanted […]
The topic of my report for Lahaina history week is the Veilstorm. Lots of people say that the Veilstorm was worse than the big accident, but I’m not sure. It […]
After the accident everyone was scared because the people who had made the rules weren’t around anymore. The survivors worried that everyone would just do what they wanted and nobody […]
For a thousand years our people lived in harmony with the island and the spirits. We drank from her waters, ate the fish in the sea, and grew plants in […]
Dear Main Office, One of the reasons I wanted to do my internship in Lahaina was because I read about your amazing lab assistant CERA. Vereserum was, and still is, […]
Dear Main Office, I won’t beat around the bush. Things here are grim and I am in dire need of food and equipment. My replacement Kānaka assistants have turned on […]
Dear Main Office, It has been quite a while since my last communication warning of my co-workers lack of focus, and failure to follow proper lab protocols. Since I didn’t […]
When Maleko told me that he wanted to enroll in your Love and Literacy program, I thought it was odd but that it couldn’t hurt. I was obviously wrong. I […]
Attention: Threatening lawyer people and their associates. Thank you so much for your threatening eviction notice attached to our doors on January 29th. We greatly regret that you chose to […]
Attention: Lahaina residents, property owners, and business operators. As many of you know, we are currently in the midst of litigation with the Lahaina Merchants Association (LMA) regarding their unauthorized […]
Attention: Lahaina residents and business owners. SSB&P’s case continues against the Lahaina Merchants Association (LMA) regarding the trademark infringement of the well-known Manimal brand, by the organization’s production and sale […]
35 years ago our parents began a dream vacation together. The opportunity to cruise the Hawaiian islands with other romance novelists was a dream come true for my mother. According […]
March 3, 2082– It’s been 5 months since I sent a detailed list of my co-workers infractions to the corporate office. Their unprofessional attitude and lack of drive continue despite […]
Dear Main Office, I was touring the Vereserum facility in Lahaina when the catastrophe hit. Fresh out of college and looking for an internship, Vereserum was my first choice. I […]
sysmsg:satpair:127.0:255.0:uname:saraphim:privlev:0 2547911520::I somehow have contact. I’m in my lobby I think. I have root. Hazy. 2690580096::I somehow have contact. I’m in my lobby I think. I have root. Hazy. I […]
Hi History, Sarah the mass murderer here, logging my progress. It’s been a bit of time since my last entry, so here’s the postmortem on my revival: A) When I […]
September 27, 2050 was a day many of us had been waiting a long time for. The annual Duracave Expo was like Christmas a couple months early. We came from […]
Front street was dangerous in the light of day, but it could be downright deadly in the dark. Mary knew she shouldn’t be there, but she couldn’t get the memories […]
Hello SSB&P employees. As we approach Q3 together I wanted to give you an update on changes to the org chart, and share some of my concerns. In short, the […]
Dear SSB&P management team, My interactions and dealings with your company began on May 9th. They were odd at first and have become increasingly unpleasant. If someone had told me […]
Hello fellow homeowners. The past 6 months have been a trying time for all of us. With all of my daily duties as president of the HOA you can imagine […]
6:00 am- Fair weather and calm seas. I have reviewed maintenance and inventory reports. The Joy is holding up well despite what we have been through. Food is almost gone. […]
Hello members of the Aloha Shores family. Frank and I would like to take a moment to thank you for sticking with us through this tumultuous time. Your trust and […]
Dear Cruise Director Amy My husband and I chose to take a Dutchess author cruise because of your long history of “elegance on the sea” and so we would be […]
October 27, 2050– It’s been exactly a month since the fracturing and as strange as it may sound, I’m beginning to think of all this as normal. We’ve managed to […]
Director Forsythe, as you requested, I’ve done an inventory of the hospital’s remaining supplies and it isn’t looking good. In the 72 hours since the accident we gone through all […]
Good Morninng SSB&P employees! I’d like to welcome everyone who decided to renew their commitment to our company yesterday during the turmoil. I’m in awe of your enthusiasm and dedication. […]
Good afternoon SSB&P employees. As I’m sure you’re aware the world is in upheaval. The veils of reality are in a state of flux, governments have been disbanding, and there […]
ZZ3K92: ”This is ZZ3K92 does anybody read me?…..This is ZZ3K92 is anyone receiving this message?…..This is ZZ3K92 is anyone out there?….My name is Richard Brace there is something terribly wrong […]
College officials, military recruiters, and business representatives will descend on Lahaina tomorrow, to attend the annual Pu’u High School Fall Showcase. It may be early in the school year, but […]
It’s known as the most beautiful run in the world amongst competitive runners, and provides millions of dollars for charity every year, but for the first time in its long […]
So you bought yourself a drone because you thought it’d be fun to fly around. However, despite what the manufacturer promised, piloting one isn’t “a breeze”, it feels more like […]
A state audit of the Hawaii Department of Motor Vehicles uncovered that an employee used over half of her work day to pursue what she called “Licensing Cheats,” for over […]
The surf was up and the spirits were low at the Lahaina Museum this weekend as the much anticipated Layla Kalani memorial opened to the public. Curators Balen and Maci […]
Mr. Abramo, I am new to the VNN family, but not to being a showrunner. However, In all my years in the industry, with dozens of successful programs under my […]
A little over a month after SSHAM launched its new “Regional Flavors” line with such eyebrow raising flavors as goat infused SSHOAT, and the duck based SSHUCK, a consumer advocacy […]
Hello Dr. Binyan. I’m sending this message via your personal ceremplant channel since the information I have is sensitive, and I assumed you’d rather not have a copy of it […]
For reality TV and streaming star Randy Wilcox, October 1st was going to be a day of redemption, a chance to recreate the stunt that almost took his life, hopefully […]
A section of beach was renamed in honor of Layla Kalani this morning. Almost 2 months ago, a wide-ranging search was officially ended after a storm capsized a vessel that […]
There’s no doubt that Lahaina’s favorite canned meat product has come a long way since Art Pua’a blended up that first loaf in his kitchen almost two decades ago. Hawaiian’s […]
Federal authorities say that they have shutdown one of the largest money laundering rings Hawaii has ever seen. According to papers filed on Thursday, the criminal enterprise laundered over $350 […]
For the second time in as many weeks, cameras have caught a hungry boar breaking into an area Big Bites location, and eating thousands of dollars worth of merchandise. The […]
All of Lahaina is in mourning today as the Coast Guard officially announced the end of its search for actress, surfing champion, and Womanimal spokesperson Layla Kalani. The surfing legend […]
Love it or hate it, if you’re a Maui native chances are you have an opinion on HRS-986, more commonly known as the drone privacy law. The legislation has ruffled […]
A pair of extreme tree climbers were saved over the weekend after falling, and suffering serious injuries late Friday night. 27-year-old Craig Hema and his wife 25-year-old Brook, suffered broken […]
In a little over 48 hours, Duracave, the popular maker of outdoor and survival gear, will be one step closer to crowning a new brand ambassador. The semi-final leg of […]
The investigation into a recent accident at one of the popular “Pineapples and Oranges” smoothie bars in downtown Lahaina took a strange twist today, thanks to the watchdog group VeilWatch. […]
A drone filming the popular Veil News Network (VNN) show “The Beach Report” crashed into the Aloha Shores condominiums early this morning, causing serious damage to several units. While nobody […]
Moderator: First, I’d like to thank you all for agreeing to be part of this special breakout session today. You four seemed to have the strongest opinions about SSHAM, SSHAM […]
An extended police chase through Lahaina came to an end last night, when 28-year-old Rodger Hihio crashed a tractor trailer, spilling 24 tons of stolen artisanal SSHAM. Responding to a […]
Lahaina residents are still reeling this morning from the accidental death of one of their own. 25-year-old prep cook Tony Paoa lost his life yesterday when he fell into a […]
Most people have a favorite meal or a food they crave. Surveys have shown that the average diner chooses one of four regular options 90% of the time they go […]
All of Lahaina is buzzing in anticipation this weekend for the announcement of the winner of the “Cabana of the Year” title on Sunday. The competition, now in its 19th […]
Sea otters attacked a tourist and her family near Oneloa Bay early Saturday morning. The group were kayaking near the otters when the pod began to push the boats, jump […]
To VeilCorp: The last time Judy and I saw our daughter was two years ago. She was being wheeled away for yet another surgery. I’m not sure anything can make […]
I’m sorry for this. I don’t know why my emplant works here. This isn’t my world. My world isn’t like this. My name is Michael Hickman and I work for […]
The Lahaina Advertiser is committed to bringing you news and content that informs, engages, and entertains. We pride ourselves with holding the highest editorial and journalistic standards, delivering to our […]
Since its discovery almost 40 years ago, Okilani an ancient Ohi’a tree on Maui, has fascinated scientists. The massive plant has been estimated to be over 4,000-years-old, making it the […]
Hailoha is defending it’s new Hailoha-Sea service today, after Mayor Albert Cravalho called for a closer look into the business, and threatened to shut down the water-based ride share service. […]
The hugely popular VNN show, “Crime Time Lahaina” has come under fire from privacy advocates, and law enforcement this week, putting the future of the newly created program in jeopardy. […]
Lahaina Police arrested a motorist Thursday evening who ran through a traffic checkpoint on Lahainaluna Road, just East of the Lahaina bypass. Authorities had just closed part of the road […]
For months tourists and a handful of clam fishermen have reported sightings of mysterious animals around Oneloa Bay. Eyewitnesses described dog sized animals usually around dusk or dawn, playing in […]
The Lahaina Museum’s Ancestral Workshops, which offer visitors a hands-on opportunity to learn the survival and crafting skills used by the first Hawaiians, has become one of the most popular […]
Dear Veilcorp employee, Congratulations on making it to VL10 and welcome to the upper management team! We are excited to be able to harness your expertise to make Veilcorp an […]
Bob Abramo has never been one to shy away from controversy, but a new promotion at his world-famous Chop House has many raising their eyebrows and loosening their belts. The […]
Veilcorp sends millions of people on billions of trips every year, but should they be legally required to transport people to safe areas during an emergency? According to a growing […]
The processed meat world was turned on its ear this week when SSHAM introduced its first completely plant-based formula, SSHANT. Despite rumors that the bright green loaf was a St. […]
Read This Notice Carefully. A Class Action Lawsuit May Affect Your Rights If you or a loved one traveled using Veilcorp technology anytime after May 10th, 2038 you might qualify […]
Veilcorp has announced that it plans to start its own news service with reports and coverage specifically geared towards the corporation’s customers. Instead of traditional journalists, the service will rely […]
After a day of protest and mountains of negative feedback, The Lahaina Merchant’s Association (LMA) has decided to end its controversial “Menehunny” Valentine’s Day giveaway. The LMA had been handing […]
A vacationing couple is claiming that their dream vacation turned into a nightmare Monday evening after witnessing a vicious attack and being held hostage in a public restroom. This type […]
People across the globe are expressing shock, anger, and disbelief over allegations from VeilWatch that Veilcorp and the U.S. government conducted a secret human-127 testing program in 2022. The watchdog […]
Lahaina is in shock this morning after disturbing allegations were made last night involving the Kokua Wellness Center and some of their most popular beauty treatments. The exclusive spa is […]
Since its inception there have been numerous accusations about the effects of the veil station in Lahaina on the surrounding plants and animals .Numerous internal investigations as well as EPA […]
It was one of the most shared stories of 2049, and the talk of Lahaina for months. 22-year-old Nate Acosta was facing felony charges for eating thousands of dollars worth […]
You find yourself in a new city, far away from the place that you call home. The sights, sounds, and even smells are unfamiliar. Everyone’s accent is different and there […]
The Lahaina City Council says they are facing an emergency whaler shortage, and have voted to offer potential applicants a generous compensation package should they be willing to fill the […]
There’s good news for everyone with a meat lover or someone who appreciates the unusual on their shopping list this holiday season. A new all-natural alternative to wrapping paper is […]
The “Meat and Greet” program was supposed to offer Lahaina’s homebound a nutritious taste of the famous Abramo Chop House and a little companionship during the day. While the program […]
The Lahaina City Council voted to end Glimpsea’s crowdsourced public safety dispatching service yesterday after numerous complaints, and high-profile mishaps. Part of the “Lahaina View Project” began in 2048, the […]
For the past 7 years, The Kokua Wellness Center and Spa has been known as one of the world’s premiere destinations for mindful relaxation and facilitated personal growth. Despite its […]
Chances are you’ve probably heard about Hailoha-Eats by now, even if you haven’t personally used our service yet. We’ve been delivering the food that you crave for over a year […]
Hawaii’s celebration of its favorite processed meat product turns 15 this year and just like SSHAM, it has only gotten better with age. Every year people from around the globe […]
The Hawaiian Department of Land and Natural Resources announced today that they would be joining the County of Maui and Glimpsea in their Lahaina View Project. Started last year, the […]
Authorities say that they believe a wave of recent bank robberies are linked to a data breach that occurred at the Kokua Wellness Center this summer. According to reports, new […]
A federal judge in Honolulu has given her final approval to a $9 million settlement to litigation brought against The Abramo Butchery Academy, a butchery and food preparation program owned […]
Malie Kahiko, one of Lahaina’s favorite daughters, is celebrating her 111th birthday today and visitors and residents alike are helping her celebrate. The popular star of the online series, “Malie’s […]
There’s no doubt that some of the most gorgeous properties on the big island are in the Puna, Kua, and Kona districts. The near perfect weather, breathtaking views, and surprisingly […]
With torrential rains in the forecast for the rest of the week, and the unusually high king tides, the flooding that has submerged much of Maui is likely to continue […]
Lahaina Police arrested an unnamed man Sunday evening, who they say brandished a shark tooth club, or leiomano, stolen from the Lahaina Museum. Officials say the man went on a […]
Their parents are some of the most wealthy people on the planet. They have become accustomed to living a lavish lifestyle, and a handful of businesses want to make sure […]
When it comes to durable medical equipment Reparre Biologic may not be the first company that comes to mind. Better known for their customized DNA medicine and tailored stem cell […]
Until now people like 40-year-old Kristyn Ribble had few ways to cope with their extreme allergies: avoid contact with their allergen, or take medications that can sometimes have serious side […]
There’s no doubt that the tourism economy has seen a huge boost in the past 10 years thanks to Veilcorp gateway technology. No single share of that boost has been […]
Good morning Mr. Pua’a. Let me start out by expressing my regret about the tone of our interactions over the past few months. I take my job here at SSHAM […]
What began as a very public neighborhood dispute has spilled over into the Lahaina political arena, as the “Clean the Lane” movement continues to gain steam. This morning, Mayor Albert […]
Lahaina residents can breathe easier today after The Hawaii Department of Land and Natural Resources (DLNR) announced that over a dozen raccoons suspected of being rabid have tested negative for […]
A prominent Reparre Biologic researcher says that she has developed a way to allow people to see clearly underwater without the use of goggles. Her procedure involves creating a nictitating […]
Having power during an outage is a luxury that everyone who own a home generator appreciates, however for some with extreme health conditions, having a constant source of power is […]
For weeks I’d been hearing about how wonderful the ancestors exhibit was at the museum so I decided to finally check it out for myself. I moved to Lahaina over […]
A Lahaina area man with a severe phobia of geese found himself face to face with his worst fear Saturday night, when a group of nene surrounded his home just […]
If you happen to visit Lahaina this weekend chances are you’ll notice more than just the breathtaking beaches and historic buildings. In addition to all the charms of Front Street, […]
In an attempt to promote healthier diets for students, and curtail disruptions in the classroom, Hawaii banned the sales of sodas, energy drinks, and high fat snacks in all public […]
Love him or hate him, if you spend any time in West Maui chances are you’ve heard meat-mogul and entrepreneur “Big” Bob Abramo. If you haven’t, you soon will. “Mouthful” […]
Veilcorp has announced that it plans to expand its wildly popular Veil Drop service across Maui, and to a handful of locations in Seattle. Part delivery and pick up program, […]
It was the biggest acquisition in history and sure to turn the healthcare and medical industry on its ear. At the beginning of the year, Reparre Biologic confirmed the rumors […]
Lahaina will once again become the center of the energy drink cocktail universe this weekend, as it hosts the 5th annual Manimal Cocktail Championships. The contest brings in hundreds vying […]
The 5th annual Manimal Cocktail Championships are being held this weekend in Lahaina, and that means one of the most controversial aspects of the competition has started prowling the streets […]
Over the past year, it has become Maui’s most popular food delivery service, but now Lahaina based Hailoha-Eats is coming under fire from privacy advocates and concerned citizens alike. The […]
It’s flu season once again and all across the island Hawaiians are breaking out the hand sanitizer, ultraviolet lights, and even traditional methods to avoid getting sick. However, the days […]
Researchers from the University of Maui Lahaina College claim they have discovered a novel therapy for curing patients suffering from the horrendous pain of kidney stones, taking a trip down […]
A little more than a month into 2049, and it’s already been a good year for Lahaina based logistics company Alohagistics. The ultra-cheap crowdsourced shipping company, best known for their […]
Congratulations, Kokua Wellness Center and Spa! Your facility now belongs to one of the most exclusive clubs in the world. Your business, and a handful like them, are responsible for […]
Unusually high winds and fast-burning trees are making it almost impossible for firefighters to contain the wildfires that are running rampant on Lanai. For the past 3 days, the fires […]
For over 20 years Sergeant Kaua’s War Academy has been Lahaina’s premiere institute for the study of the combat arts. The Sgt. has taught hundreds how to shoot, strike, and […]
I had planned on thanking you all for turning out last night at the unveiling of our ethnobotanical garden. I was going to explain to you all how important the […]
Fractured Hearts is the leading matching service in Lahaina for lonely survivors, Thrivers, Kanaka, or the recently restored. We’ll help you not only find the person right for you, but […]
Since 1975, Suter, Stine, Burn & Partners (SSB&P) has developed a regional and national presence serving a diverse client base with advice and legal counsel. Since the fracturing of the […]
The tunnels, lava tubes, and storage facilities beneath Lahaina have long been popular places for those with an adventurous spirit to explore. Finding supplies and weapons can be very lucrative […]
There are many legends on the island and many mysterious events everyday, but one of the most recent is the appearance of strangers dressed in the clothing of the old. […]
She says the world ended, that the veils fractured and almost everything is gone. She’s in my head. She tells me her name is Saraphim but I can’t remember mine. […]
For the past 10 years you’ve counted on the Lahaina Merchants Association’s public roasting pits to provide a safe and convenient place to cook large meals for your friends and […]
Living on an island and being so connected to the water, it is no surprise that so many Kanaka legends focus on boats and the sea. We are taught how […]
The Kanaka have many sacred areas and revered places on the island, but a few stand out from the others. The Augustinian Cliffs are one such place. Sitting in the […]
In many ways modern Lahaina is a land of contradictions. First-time visitors are often stunned by the natural beauty of the lush valleys and colorful fish of the reefs. The […]
As President of the Lahaina Merchants Association, I’d like to thank my fellow sellers and citizens for making the past year our best and brightest so far. Our Fall initiatives […]
Over 60 years ago my grandfather Buddy began Da Kine Air to serve all of your ventilation and air conditioning needs. Through hard work and professional service Buddy turned Da […]
There are a handful of buildings that survived the devastation of the great fracture. Many like the radio tower, serve as landmarks and offer a reminder of the past. Others […]
The fracture destroyed large swathes of land and a majority of the population, but it wasn’t just lives that were lost. Many of the systems and constructs of society were […]
For over almost 20 years I’ve proudly led this group. When I started, many of us were selling scrounged tools and cans of food in dark alleys. Under my leadership […]
There is no doubt that the fracture changed life as we know it. The collapse of governments, the destruction of buildings in the explosions, and the sickness and famine it […]
To whom it may concern, My name is Gloria Barnaby and I am outraged at what passes for customer service at your company! As a retired school teacher living on […]
The Kānaka’s relationship with technology is a complex one. While they accept the need for science and machinery, most consider the fracture to be a direct result of an unhealthy […]
I’ve been highlighting the Regulators and it’s most important members this week. There have been a number of groups that shaped Lahaina after the fracture, but there’s no doubt that […]
There have been a number of groups and individuals who have impacted the day to day lives of survivors on the island. Few have had as big of an impact […]
There is no shortage of mysterious legends and strange places in Lahaina. Whether it’s a cryptic Hailoha driver patrolling Front Street, a mountain top ghost ship, or an eccentric survivor […]
There have been a number of groups and individuals who have helped make the island livable since the fracture. From science fair kids joining forces with a dance troupe, to […]
We Kanaka are known for our easy going lifestyle, and taking time to enjoy what nature has provided, but there is one thing we take seriously, our stories. We have […]
The Kanaka believe that everyone is given the same two things when they are born. The world gives you a purpose and your ancestors give you a special skill. As […]
We Kanaka are natural storytellers. We teach our children about the island, our beliefs, and our history through our tales. While these stories cover many topics, the most common theme […]
At the request of program specialist Gary, and against my better judgment, I have been hard at work assessing the feasibility of a menehune domestication program for the Lahaina Merchants […]
Congratulations, you are cordially and secretly invited to the 11th annual Tappers Day Before Christmas Spectapluar! If you’re reading this note you already know how serious we take this event […]
For over 50 years the Lahaina Merchants Association’s weekly auctions have given islanders a place to buy food, water, and the rest of life’s necessities at a reasonable price. Many […]
Saraphim? No, I don’t want you to burn anything in the room, or rub anything on me. I just want the usual treatment. Saraphim….restoration? No! I come here to catch […]
This was not how I imagined my day would start. She says her name is Saraphim, and that the world as we know it is gone. She says something about […]
Dear Lahaina Merchants Association We represent the owners of trademark registration no. 11948372 here and in dimension ∃3.81.654729. Widespread use of the Manimal trademark has been made, to the extent […]
The green island couldn’t hold us! We managed to reboot, albeit not in our own bodies oddly, onto Lahaina today. The island is beautiful, but of course we’d rather be […]
Of all the dangers in the forest, the most dangerous might be the green ladies. Whether they are feeding on a family, catching the unwary in the forest, or hunting […]
For years you’ve known Sgt. Kaua’s War Academy as the premiere hand to hand combat academy and school of battle on the island. The academy has deep roots and a […]
For as long as I’ve been responsible for teaching your children I’ve tried to prepare them for life on the island while teaching them the importance of knowing how we […]
Snow may not be the first thing people think about when they think of the island, but the summit of Haleakalā does occasionally get snow, and it’s not unusual for […]
There are a bunch of animals on the island that aren’t native to the land. The first people brought some of them here on purpose like pigs, dogs, and chickens. […]
Everyone has their favorite holiday. Some of my friends like Christmas because they get presents like candy or a new knife. Others like Thanksgiving because of all the different food, […]
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There are lots of legends about lost treasures, forgotten food stores, and hidden caches of weapons on the island. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve heard stories about […]
For a long time people celebrated Thanksgiving every year because they didn’t have to worry about having enough food. The first Thanksgiving happened a long, long time ago before people […]
The fracture made a lot of scary things you have to be worried about. Nobody wants to come across a green lady or a group of night marchers, but some […]
The Kanaka don’t teach their kids in the same way we do here in Pu’u. They use stories. Since they didn’t plan as well as people like my grandpa and […]
Even though many of them are sick from the big accident, the Kānaka are really good hunters and fisherman. They are also great storytellers. They use their stories to help […]
Right after the big accident people like my grandpa had to work hard to find enough food, water, and medicine. It was tough, but they made it. By working together […]
Everyone makes mistakes, and my grandpa says it’s ok to make mistakes as long as you learn from them. One of my favorite stories about learning from your mistakes is […]
The people who first came to the island brought a lot of things with them like food and tools, but they also brought the idea of sacred places. Long ago […]
In the past, before my grandpa and his friends made everything safe on the hill, people would carve tiki idols to help them remember people or stories. Some of the […]
After the accident everyone was scared because the people who had made the rules weren’t around anymore. The survivors worried that everyone would just do what they wanted and nobody […]
For a thousand years our people lived in harmony with the island and the spirits. We drank from her waters, ate the fish in the sea, and grew plants in […]
Dear Main Office, One of the reasons I wanted to do my internship in Lahaina was because I read about your amazing lab assistant CERA. Vereserum was, and still is, […]
Dear Main Office, I won’t beat around the bush. Things here are grim and I am in dire need of food and equipment. My replacement Kānaka assistants have turned on […]
Dear Main Office, It has been quite a while since my last communication warning of my co-workers lack of focus, and failure to follow proper lab protocols. Since I didn’t […]
When Maleko told me that he wanted to enroll in your Love and Literacy program, I thought it was odd but that it couldn’t hurt. I was obviously wrong. I […]
Attention: Threatening lawyer people and their associates. Thank you so much for your threatening eviction notice attached to our doors on January 29th. We greatly regret that you chose to […]
Attention: Lahaina residents, property owners, and business operators. As many of you know, we are currently in the midst of litigation with the Lahaina Merchants Association (LMA) regarding their unauthorized […]
Attention: Lahaina residents and business owners. SSB&P’s case continues against the Lahaina Merchants Association (LMA) regarding the trademark infringement of the well-known Manimal brand, by the organization’s production and sale […]
March 3, 2082– It’s been 5 months since I sent a detailed list of my co-workers infractions to the corporate office. Their unprofessional attitude and lack of drive continue despite […]
Front street was dangerous in the light of day, but it could be downright deadly in the dark. Mary knew she shouldn’t be there, but she couldn’t get the memories […]
Hello SSB&P employees. As we approach Q3 together I wanted to give you an update on changes to the org chart, and share some of my concerns. In short, the […]
Dear SSB&P management team, My interactions and dealings with your company began on May 9th. They were odd at first and have become increasingly unpleasant. If someone had told me […]
Hello fellow homeowners. The past 6 months have been a trying time for all of us. With all of my daily duties as president of the HOA you can imagine […]
6:00 am- Fair weather and calm seas. I have reviewed maintenance and inventory reports. The Joy is holding up well despite what we have been through. Food is almost gone. […]
Hello members of the Aloha Shores family. Frank and I would like to take a moment to thank you for sticking with us through this tumultuous time. Your trust and […]
Frank and I would like to thank you all for hanging in there. We understand that this is a time of fear and confusion for many of you. Heck, I’d […]
ZZ3K92: ”This is ZZ3K92 does anybody read me?…..This is ZZ3K92 is anyone receiving this message?…..This is ZZ3K92 is anyone out there?….My name is Richard Brace there is something terribly wrong […]
So you bought yourself a drone because you thought it’d be fun to fly around. However, despite what the manufacturer promised, piloting one isn’t “a breeze”, it feels more like […]
A state audit of the Hawaii Department of Motor Vehicles uncovered that an employee used over half of her work day to pursue what she called “Licensing Cheats,” for over […]
Mr. Abramo, I am new to the VNN family, but not to being a showrunner. However, In all my years in the industry, with dozens of successful programs under my […]
A little over a month after SSHAM launched its new “Regional Flavors” line with such eyebrow raising flavors as goat infused SSHOAT, and the duck based SSHUCK, a consumer advocacy […]
Hello Dr. Binyan. I’m sending this message via your personal ceremplant channel since the information I have is sensitive, and I assumed you’d rather not have a copy of it […]
For reality TV and streaming star Randy Wilcox, October 1st was going to be a day of redemption, a chance to recreate the stunt that almost took his life, hopefully […]
A section of beach was renamed in honor of Layla Kalani this morning. Almost 2 months ago, a wide-ranging search was officially ended after a storm capsized a vessel that […]
There’s no doubt that Lahaina’s favorite canned meat product has come a long way since Art Pua’a blended up that first loaf in his kitchen almost two decades ago. Hawaiian’s […]
For the second time in as many weeks, cameras have caught a hungry boar breaking into an area Big Bites location, and eating thousands of dollars worth of merchandise. The […]
A pair of extreme tree climbers were saved over the weekend after falling, and suffering serious injuries late Friday night. 27-year-old Craig Hema and his wife 25-year-old Brook, suffered broken […]
A drone filming the popular Veil News Network (VNN) show “The Beach Report” crashed into the Aloha Shores condominiums early this morning, causing serious damage to several units. While nobody […]
Moderator: First, I’d like to thank you all for agreeing to be part of this special breakout session today. You four seemed to have the strongest opinions about SSHAM, SSHAM […]
Lahaina residents are still reeling this morning from the accidental death of one of their own. 25-year-old prep cook Tony Paoa lost his life yesterday when he fell into a […]
Most people have a favorite meal or a food they crave. Surveys have shown that the average diner chooses one of four regular options 90% of the time they go […]
Sea otters attacked a tourist and her family near Oneloa Bay early Saturday morning. The group were kayaking near the otters when the pod began to push the boats, jump […]
The Lahaina Advertiser is committed to bringing you news and content that informs, engages, and entertains. We pride ourselves with holding the highest editorial and journalistic standards, delivering to our […]
Since its discovery almost 40 years ago, Okilani an ancient Ohi’a tree on Maui, has fascinated scientists. The massive plant has been estimated to be over 4,000-years-old, making it the […]
Hailoha is defending it’s new Hailoha-Sea service today, after Mayor Albert Cravalho called for a closer look into the business, and threatened to shut down the water-based ride share service. […]
The hugely popular VNN show, “Crime Time Lahaina” has come under fire from privacy advocates, and law enforcement this week, putting the future of the newly created program in jeopardy. […]
The Lahaina Museum’s Ancestral Workshops, which offer visitors a hands-on opportunity to learn the survival and crafting skills used by the first Hawaiians, has become one of the most popular […]
Dear Veilcorp employee, Congratulations on making it to VL10 and welcome to the upper management team! We are excited to be able to harness your expertise to make Veilcorp an […]
Veilcorp sends millions of people on billions of trips every year, but should they be legally required to transport people to safe areas during an emergency? According to a growing […]
The processed meat world was turned on its ear this week when SSHAM introduced its first completely plant-based formula, SSHANT. Despite rumors that the bright green loaf was a St. […]
I write this not to those of you who know the damage Veilcorp and fossil fuels have done to the world. This is not for my brothers and sisters who […]
Veilcorp has announced that it plans to start its own news service with reports and coverage specifically geared towards the corporation’s customers. Instead of traditional journalists, the service will rely […]
A vacationing couple is claiming that their dream vacation turned into a nightmare Monday evening after witnessing a vicious attack and being held hostage in a public restroom. This type […]
Lahaina is in shock this morning after disturbing allegations were made last night involving the Kokua Wellness Center and some of their most popular beauty treatments. The exclusive spa is […]
Since its inception there have been numerous accusations about the effects of the veil station in Lahaina on the surrounding plants and animals .Numerous internal investigations as well as EPA […]
You find yourself in a new city, far away from the place that you call home. The sights, sounds, and even smells are unfamiliar. Everyone’s accent is different and there […]
For the past 7 years, The Kokua Wellness Center and Spa has been known as one of the world’s premiere destinations for mindful relaxation and facilitated personal growth. Despite its […]
Chances are you’ve probably heard about Hailoha-Eats by now, even if you haven’t personally used our service yet. We’ve been delivering the food that you crave for over a year […]
Hawaii’s celebration of its favorite processed meat product turns 15 this year and just like SSHAM, it has only gotten better with age. Every year people from around the globe […]
A federal judge in Honolulu has given her final approval to a $9 million settlement to litigation brought against The Abramo Butchery Academy, a butchery and food preparation program owned […]
Malie Kahiko, one of Lahaina’s favorite daughters, is celebrating her 111th birthday today and visitors and residents alike are helping her celebrate. The popular star of the online series, “Malie’s […]
There’s no doubt that some of the most gorgeous properties on the big island are in the Puna, Kua, and Kona districts. The near perfect weather, breathtaking views, and surprisingly […]
Lahaina Police arrested an unnamed man Sunday evening, who they say brandished a shark tooth club, or leiomano, stolen from the Lahaina Museum. Officials say the man went on a […]
There’s no doubt that the tourism economy has seen a huge boost in the past 10 years thanks to Veilcorp gateway technology. No single share of that boost has been […]
Good morning Mr. Pua’a. Let me start out by expressing my regret about the tone of our interactions over the past few months. I take my job here at SSHAM […]
What began as a very public neighborhood dispute has spilled over into the Lahaina political arena, as the “Clean the Lane” movement continues to gain steam. This morning, Mayor Albert […]
Lahaina residents can breathe easier today after The Hawaii Department of Land and Natural Resources (DLNR) announced that over a dozen raccoons suspected of being rabid have tested negative for […]
For weeks I’d been hearing about how wonderful the ancestors exhibit was at the museum so I decided to finally check it out for myself. I moved to Lahaina over […]
If you happen to visit Lahaina this weekend chances are you’ll notice more than just the breathtaking beaches and historic buildings. In addition to all the charms of Front Street, […]
Veilcorp has announced that it plans to expand its wildly popular Veil Drop service across Maui, and to a handful of locations in Seattle. Part delivery and pick up program, […]
Over the past year, it has become Maui’s most popular food delivery service, but now Lahaina based Hailoha-Eats is coming under fire from privacy advocates and concerned citizens alike. The […]
It’s flu season once again and all across the island Hawaiians are breaking out the hand sanitizer, ultraviolet lights, and even traditional methods to avoid getting sick. However, the days […]
Congratulations, Kokua Wellness Center and Spa! Your facility now belongs to one of the most exclusive clubs in the world. Your business, and a handful like them, are responsible for […]