Pana and the Lahaina Armory

The Kanaka believe that everyone is given the same two things when they are born. The world gives you a purpose and your ancestors give you a special skill. As you work your way through life, it is your job to discover your purpose and to cultivate your skill. It is not easy. In fact, it is one of the hardest parts of life. Often your purpose and your skill don’t have anything to do with one another. Many lose their way while trying to find their purpose. Some never get a chance to practice their skill before it is time to rejoin their ancestors, leading to much anger and discontent. However, A rare few seem to have a special insight and know from an early age what their life should look like and what they should do. Auntie Pana is one such person. Her purpose in life is to provide those around her with the tools necessary to protect themselves and the ones they love, and her skill is gunsmithing.

Before the fracture the building we all know now as The Armory was a museum. There people could look at ancient artifacts and learn not just the history of the islands but of other places and cultures as well. It is where Pana’s parents met, worked, and fell in love. It was also their sanctuary after the accident. The Armory’s strong walls and roof allowed it to survive the chaos while other structures were laid to waste. Being a museum, it was not at the top of the list for looting, so Pana’s parents didn’t have to worry about bandits or desperate survivors. There probably isn’t a perfect place to try and ride out the end of a civilization, but her mother thought this was as close as they were going to get. Her parents gathered all their surviving extended family and tried to make new lives for themselves.

Pana was different from other children, her sister Oki included. While her sister delighted in picking flowers to decorate the halls, and hearing tales of great battles and heroes, before going to the beach to look for shark teeth, Pana was more reserved. She would spend her days inside learning how things worked and building herself toys from broken or discarded gear. Above all, she loved her grandfather’s old revolver and was never found without it. Her father worried that such an item was inappropriate or dangerous for someone so young, but her mother reassured him that it hadn’t worked since she herself was a little girl and they didn’t have any bullets. Since it seemed to give her so much comfort they agreed to let her have it. While most girls her age had a favorite blanket or doll to help them go to sleep, Pana tucked the revolver beneath her pillow every night before drifting off. It was one such night that Pana’s skill first revealed itself.

Her father was awoken by a noise coming from outside. A team of deadly forest boars were rooting and tearing through the family garden. Her father ran to awaken the rest of the family to try and drive the beasts off and save their food. Just as he was gathering the spears they would need he heard a gunshot. Fearing that bandits were attacking he began to barricade the front door when he noticed little Pana slip through a window. In her hand she held her grandfather’s smoking revolver, “I topped da boes fum eating our food daddy,” she proudly proclaimed.

The adults cautiously went to the garden only to find a large boar with one clean hole directly in the shoulder; the perfect place to drop the creature. At barely 4, Pana had not only fixed the gun but had made a handful of cartridges. At her father’s urging, Pana showed him the tools she had made including a reloading press constructed from a bike pump and an old waffle iron. Amazed at her ingenuity and talent, the family began to indulge the girl’s desire to learn and innovate. Not to be outdone by her sister, Oki proved to be remarkable in her own right, becoming a master of the more traditional arms of the islands.

While her sister’s creations are full of flourish and intricate designs, Auntie Pana has become a master of no frills precision and dependable mechanics. In contrast to the well kept and immaculately decorated rooms of The Armory run by her sister, Pana’s workshop in a hodgepodge of tools, partially completed projects, and “items of promise”. Oki often quips that her sister is “a ballistic goddess, not a domestic one.” But her abilities and skill are no joke. Her tree cannons are well known on the island and feared by bandits and creatures of the fracture alike. Her internalized cocking mechanisms are ingenious. Her automatic ejector systems are divine. Pana learned her purpose at a very young age and has been honing her skills for over 50 years now. There is no better place to buy a weapon on the island than The Armory, and there is no better gunsmith than Auntie Pana.

My Day With an Expert: Auntie Oki

An expert is someone who has a special skill or knowledge in a certain area that nobody else has. There are many experts on the island. Some are really good at finding water, knowing what the animals are going to do, or fixing things that break. Sometimes people argue about who’s the best expert at certain things but when it comes to shark-toothed weapons everyone agrees. Nobody is as good as Auntie Oki. When I learned that we had to spend a day with an expert for this assignment, I knew right away that I wanted to spend a day with her.

Oki and her sister Pana run the armory. Before the fracture the armory used to be a museum. Lots of people would come to look at all kinds of old stuff, not just weapons. Since the accident, the sister’s family have made it the best place to buy the equipment you need to protect yourself and keep you alive if you’re out exploring.

Leiomano is an old Hawaiian word that means “lei of the shark”. Today it’s a word that means any kind of shark-toothed weapon and it is Oki’s specialty. She says that making leiomano is a form of art and she tries to make each of her weapons as suitable for framing on the wall as they are at slicing through a Nightmarcher.

Every morning Oki puts on her beach hat and sets out just before sunrise to look for shark teeth. “You find the best ones right at dawn,” she says. Oki prefers tiger shark teeth but says you can use any heavily serrated species like dusky, bull, or even great white teeth. Even though the pointy teeth of the different kind of reef sharks look cool, Oki says they don’t cut very well so she only uses them for decoration or toys.

She carries the teeth back home in specially made bundles of hau tree cloth and palm fibers to avoid the teeth cracking or becoming dull by rubbing against each other. In her workshop, Oki lays out all the teeth, grades them, and decides what color schemes, patterns, and weapon types each tooth would be good for.

Oki says that every tooth, tusk, and antler she finds has a place and that there are a numerous opportunities in every home to “tastefully weaponize the decor”. She is almost as well known for her nontraditional creations as she is for her leiomano work. Every night Oki teaches a class on creative armament design for anyone interested in the subject. She says her exclusive line of boar-tusk brooms are, “easy to use and are as deadly as they are elegant.” But when it comes to shark teeth she does things the old way.

Oki treats the teeth with a special process handed down through her family to make them hard and less brittle. Even though I asked politely, she wouldn’t tell me what it was. She only uses koa or milo wood in her weapons. She says that they are the most durable and fit in well with almost any color palette.

Some people say that the best way to secure a tooth to a weapon is to lash it without drilling holes or use a strong epoxy or glue. Oki says those methods are lazy and can lead to tooth or life loss in battle, as well as a missed opportunity to add exciting accent features to a weapon. Auntie Oki uses a small laser drill to score her treated shark teeth before punching a hole with a handmade sandalwood awl. She says you can’t make beautiful weapons unless you’re using beautiful tools.

The ancient Hawaiians believed a lot of weird things about teeth. They believed that shark teeth could protect you from shark attacks and made warriors more brave. They also believed that if you took a molar from a fallen enemy and inlay it in a club, the mana from the slain warrior was transferred to the weapon, giving its owner more spiritual power. Owning a shark-toothed weapon was a great honor and would make its wielder almost impervious to harm. But Oki says her creations are for display and devastation purposes only, not for spiritual protection.

If you are looking for: a Koa axe, a niho knife, a hoe leiomano paddle, or just a simple shark-toothed club, there is no better place to look than the armory. My mom says that I’m still too young to get a pololu spear, but when I grow up, I know Oki will make me a beautiful one that will match my favorite boots.

Akamai Mahelona
4th Grade
Pu`u School Lahaina

Civilization is ending but your job doesn’t have to

Good afternoon SSB&P employees. As I’m sure you’re aware the world is in upheaval. The veils of reality are in a state of flux, governments are disbanding, and there has been death and destruction on a scale that is difficult to comprehend. We understand that many of you want to spend your final hours with loved ones or mark off as much of your bucket list as possible. Before you do, let me ask you a question. What if I told you that we’ve made some adjustments to the org chart and there’s a spot on it for you!

The New York and Seattle offices seem to be lost but as you know, we believe in turning problems into solutions here at SSB&P. In that spirit, I have merged what is left of the marketing department with legal and have taken control of everything above the executive mezzanine. Unfortunately, we had to let Sandy from HR go. I think we can all agree that she was a wonderful woman, but was far too naïve to be trusted with our future success. The cafeteria is now held by Phil from maintenance and most of the janitorial crew. For certain considerations, Phil has agreed to offer nourishing meals and refreshing drinks as long as supplies last. All employees who find themselves with a position on the new chart are welcome to enjoy the safety and relaxation of the cafe.

Make no mistake, Brian or anyone else from the mailroom, we will end you if we find where you’re hiding. It is beyond me why you thought you had what it took to take on the management team. We have years of ziplining and trust falls to bind us together. Let me assure you that Phil has made the cafeteria quite secure and it would be in your best interest to exit the building. Just in case you’re foolish enough to try another hostile takeover, I am offering a guaranteed place on the org chart for anyone bringing me Brian or any other former mailroom employee.

Our transition team is putting together welcome packs and Phil will be giving some basic hand-to-hand instruction in conference room B later today. All employees will be able to carry over vacation and sick time as well as any profit-sharing agreements. With all the chaos going on out there wouldn’t you appreciate some stability? The world may be forever changed but your employment doesn’t have to. Get on up to the 10th floor and let us know that you want to be part of the new team! Anyone caught inside after dark without a welcome packet will be terminated.

When one door closes another one opens. We just had a really big door close on us but I am confident the best is yet to come. With your hard work and attention, I believe we can become the first cross-dimensional law firm. The opportunity is deeper than deep, it’s infinite!

Lahaina Ancestor Exhibit Misses the Mark

For weeks I’d been hearing about how wonderful the ancestors exhibit was at the museum so I decided to finally check it out for myself. I moved to Lahaina over 4 years ago and have completely embraced the way of life and culture. I’ve never lived someplace that felt so perfect before. I couldn’t wait to see the artifacts and learn more about my adopted people. To put it bluntly, what I found inside was horrifying. Instead of uplifting a proud and ecologically responsible culture, I was exposed to a hit job of the grossest kind.

First, let me address the elephant in the room. Let’s talk about the shark teeth. They are tied, wedged, and jammed into a majority of the “artifacts”. Did I mention that most of the artifacts are really weapons? There are shark teeth clubs, daggers, and things that I don’t even know what they are. I was surprised that the gratuitous amount of teeth didn’t spill over into other parts of the museum. I fully expected to find shark-toothed pens or bookmarks in the gift shop.

I’m not saying that these items might not have been occasionally used in the past, just that this dental damnation of the Hawaiian people was offensive. I’m not sure why we as a community would support this sort of thing.

I had heard that tiki idols were used at one time to revere ancestors but that was before pens and paper. It’s hardly the Hawaiian people’s fault that they used these grotesques at one point before they had the technology to write down, “Grandpa Joe is a really great guy!”

Hula skirts were nowhere to be seen except the gift shop. Are we really to believe that the early explorers brought dance and clothing to Hawaii? The same held true for leis. I guess the islanders couldn’t string a bunch of flowers together either until the big boats showed up.

After a few minutes of looking around at this Polynesian minstrel show, my hands began to shake with anger and I had to leave. I thought about what I’d seen all day and decided that I should warn everyone thinking of going to the exhibit and to help the “experts” at the museum with their next “celebration of Hawaiian culture and history.” Here it goes.

Real Hawaiians don’t drink out of hollowed-out pineapples and coconuts. Pineapples aren’t even indigenous to the islands. We enjoy our adult beverages in glasses with LED lighting like everyone else. We don’t put on flip-flops and walk down to the beach to play our ukuleles. We wear rubbah slippers and listen to the house band at the resort. I’d never wear a shirt that combined flowers with cars or animals. True Hawaiian shirts have flowers, various plants, and maybe surfboards. That’s it. Anything else is cultural appropriation. Our free time is not spent watching the spam sculpture competition at the fair. We eat musubi and spicy spam sushi rolls.

The Hawaii I’ve come to know and love is about beautiful beaches, the bounty of nature, and buffets. When we have a problem we go down to the local beach bar, watch the surfers, and talk it out over chi-chi’s. We don’t rip open bellies with the tooth-encrusted handguards on our bone punch-daggers when we have a disagreement. I’m no historian but I think we as a people, and certainly our children, deserve better than what is on display now. Let’s forget the past and work together to frame a better narrative moving forward.

Man Behind Controversial Shellfish Shooting Petition Speaks Out

FIREARMS AND FRIENDS

Aired October 5, 2048 – 20:00 HAST

THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. THIS COPY MAY NOT BE IN ITS FINAL FORM AND MAY BE UPDATED.

[20:00:07] RANDY WILCOX, FIREARMS AND FRIENDS HOST: Good evening Lahaina and those not lucky enough to live in paradise.

We have a really special episode for you tonight. In just a few minutes, we’ll be discussing the controversial opihi shooting petition with its architect, to learn why he believes it’s important to allow a new way to harvest those delicious little limpets, and a whole lot more.

First I want to let you know that tonight’s episode is brought to you by Lahaina’s Big Bites stores, the big cure for a big hunger. Choose from over 1,000 meats or meat related delicacies. Make your own sausage with one of Big Bites’ onsite grinders, or choose from the biggest collection of jerky in the Pacific. Let the kids grab all the cold cuts they can catch inside the Meat Twister machine, or order a colorful marinated meat arrangement. There’s one perfect for any occasion. Whether you’re planning a special event or just want a snack, stop by a Big Bites store and have a meaty bite of paradise.

We’re also brought to you by Board Entertainment’s hit show, Veil Sale. Now in it’s 8th season. Watch yours truly and my partner John Driscol bid on forgotten packages, abandoned freight, and misplaced luggage. Each bag might hold a treasure or just dirty laundry. Watch us take a chance trying to hit it big by turning one man’s trash into our treasure. Whether it’s 100 gallons of pig milk, 10,000 electric toothbrushes, or an antique shoe collection, it’s all worth something to someone. Tune in every Thursday at 9 HAST to find out what’s in the next box.

WILCOX: Now that we’ve paid for the bullets and the bandwidth, let me welcome Balen Kiko to the show.

BALEN KIKO, LAHAINA HERITAGE MUSEUM CURATOR: Thank you Randy. It’s a pleasure to be on the show, I’m a big fan.

WILCOX: The pleasure is all mine Balen. Before we discuss the petition would you mind if we talk a bit about your day job?

KIKO: Not al all, it’s your show.

WILCOX: For those who don’t know, Balen is the curator of the Lahaina Heritage Museum.

KIKO: Guilty as charged. My wife and I took over the Museum almost 20 years-ago now.

WILCOX: I have to tell you… and for those of you who haven’t checked the museum out yet, I highly recommend it. I have to tell you that your weapons exhibits, with all the shark teeth is….

KIKO: Leiomano, it’s an old Hawaiian word that means “lei of the shark”.

WILCOX: Whatever they used to call it, I call it awesome! Waving around something like that really sends a message, and it aint, “Would you like to help me finish eating this cake?”

KIKO: [Laughing] I know what you mean. I can only imagine what it would feel like to have a Koa warrior charging at you with a leiomano club over his head. It’d be terrifying, but you know, my youngest daughter loves it. We have a joke around the house that if Oki had her way there’d be leiomano frying pans in every kitchen.

WILCOX: [Laughing] That would put a whole new twist on doing the dishes for sure.

KIKO: Yes it would.

WILCOX: But we didn’t ask you on the show to talk about shark teeth. We invited you because of a petition you’ve started…

KIKO: Oh, you’ve heard about the petition?

WILCOX: [Chuckles] Well, not everyone I know is talking about it, just almost everyone.

KIKO: Yeah, I expected some pushback and discussion, but I didn’t expect it to grow into such a big issue. It seems like everyone not only has an opinion, but a STRONG opinion. You wouldn’t believe some of the things people have said. It’s been an eye-opener for sure.

WILCOX: In case someone has been frozen or stuck inside the veil for the past 2 months, could you explain the petition and what you hope to achieve?

KIKO: Sure, sure. Basically, I want to make it legal to use a firearm to harvest opihi.

WILCOX: For our viewers on the mainland could you explain what opihi are and why shooting them is a good idea in your opinion.

KIKO: Sure, but first let me clarify that I don’t want to shoot them. Shooting one would ruin it. I want to use a firearm to help collect them, which is illegal now.

Opihi is a type of small shellfish, a type of limpet to be precise, that is one of the most sought out delicacies in the world. The problem is they live in remote, rocky shores that get a lot of surf and big waves. Every year, people get hurt or killed trying to pry them off rocks. That gives you an idea of how good they are.

A long time ago when a market for them started, Hawaiians would harvest close to 150,000 pounds annually. Last year there was less than 10,000 pounds commercially available island-wide.

WILCOX: Wow.

KIKO: Yeah, now part of that, as the greenies will tell you, is a depletion in stock, but a big part of it is also how dangerous harvesting them is. You’re standing in swirling surf, on slippery, jagged rocks trying to pry half-dollar sized shellfish off a rock with a knife as waves pound you in the head. It’s a nightmare!

My wife and I love opihi and we were concerned about not being able to buy them one day. We did a little brainstorming and testing with things around the house and came up with this method. I have a video if you’d like to see what I’m proposing.

WILCOX: Sure, Let’s take a look.

[WILCOX AND KIKO WATCH HARVESTING VIDEO]

WILCOX: Good stuff Balen. Was that a .22?

KIKO: Yeah, I think anything larger would destroy too many, but I’m not saying it couldn’t be done with a larger caliber round. It’s just such a precise process, I mean as you could see, you have to be a pretty good shot to chip them off the rocks.

WILCOX: And was your wife using a pool skimmer?

KIKO: Yeah, our system requires two people, another thing that a lot of people don’t understand. A lot of people say that my proposal would make harvesting opihi even more dangerous because they only know what they’ve heard. As you could see, the way we do it requires a shooter and a catcher. Having another person there, and able to get help makes the process a lot less dangerous.

We found the pool skimmer to be perfect. The long handle allows the catcher to be far enough away from the rock to avoid flying fragments or ricochet, and it’s light enough that your arms won’t get burned-out after a day of shellfish shooting.

WILCOX: Now it looked like a lot of the opihi were still grabbing onto bits of rock when they fell off.

KIKO: Sure, you still have to do some additional cleaning and scraping when you get home but the most dangerous part, getting them off the rocks, is done in relative safety.

WILCOX: Have you shown this video before? I think it answers a lot of questions.

KIKO: I have, and it’s available on our website.

The problem is that most people have made their mind up already, and anytime you mention guns, as I’m sure you know, a certain percentage of people just shut down.

WILCOX: So that’s the main issue people have, the guns?

KIKO: That’s part of it. I expected that of course. There are some people that just won’t understand balancing on ocean rocks in the breakers and shooting small shellfish, while your partner tries to catch them with a net, no matter how clearly you explain it to them.

There’s also concern about people using old lead rounds which would be bad for fish and seabirds and destroying the rocks that the opihi live on. I understand the first issue, but I think the danger is grossly overstated. They stopped making lead ammunition many years ago, but the rock thing blows my mind. It’s like these people have never heard of erosion. Remember, these rocks are getting pounded all day every day by the ocean. Do you have any idea how many .22 rounds it would take to turn a big beach rock into rubble?

WILCOX: Around 75,000. We did it in episode 22. We had to pour water over the barrels they got so hot.

KIKO: That’s what I’m saying. You’re shooting a rock at most a dozen times when you’re collecting opihi, no way near enough to cause excess damage.

WILCOX: I see our time is almost up but I think you’ve made a great case for allowing a firearms harvest of opihi. How many signatures do you need and how many do you have?

KIKO: We need 81,435 to get the proposal on the ballot and we’re about a third of the way there after only 2 weeks, so we’re very hopeful. That said, people keep signing the name Burroughs and warning my wife not to balance any opihi on her head.

WILCOX: Right…Well, even though I’m allergic to shellfish, I’d be proud to sign your petition after the show. I think the fact that people are trying to stop the ballistic harvest of mollusks speaks volumes about where we’ve let ourselves go as a country. I wish you and your petition all the best.

KIKO: Thanks for the support, and allowing us to get the message out through this platform. I’m not just fighting for the right to shoot in the surf for you and me. I’m doing it for future generations. Thanks again!

VeilCorp Lab Vandalized, Animals Stolen

from: Heather Ward
to: Robert Bennett
date: Wed, May 9, 2035 at 7:53 AM
subject: I Need These Rats Gone

Hi Robert

Let me start off by saying how proud I am to be able to help you with the work that you do. We both know how important it is and how we need people like you who are willing to get their hands dirty. I hope you know that you can count on me to do whatever it is I can to further the cause. I’ve always been willing to take in any animals that you’ve brought me. I agreed to take in the monkeys from your last operation even though I’m not setup to handle exotics. I’m here for you and you can count on me, but I can’t have these rats here.

I understand why you’re working with VeilWatch, I really do. VeilCorp is destroying the planet and Gaia Guard has always been about defending our mother and all of her children. If VeilWatch is working other angles to bring down the giant so be it. We can use all the help we can get, but something really bad must have been going on at the lab you just liberated.

I can’t explain it, but I had a bad feeling as soon as you brought them in. After you left, I put them in the small animal room and all the other animals started acting funny. My dogs wouldn’t even go in and they love coming in to see the new guests. After I set them down, they all lined up and just stared at me. I brought them food and they wouldn’t eat. They didn’t explore their cage. They just sat there in a row looking at me wherever I went in the room. I’m not sure if it was their weird behavior or that both Izzy and Enzo were crying at the doorway, but I got really frightened. I chalked it up to the fact that I was harboring the most wanted rats in Washington but now I think I was wrong.

A few hours later I was trying to go to bed when I started hearing music coming from the other side of the house. I thought maybe I left a window open but then I heard a thumping noise and my cat Pixel cry out. I got up and ran towards the back of the house but not before hearing another thump and Pixel scream.

The first thing I noticed was that the door to the rat cage was open. None of the rats were gone though. They were just lined up like before, facing the aquarium rack. I saw that the stereo had been turned on and walked over to shut it off when something went flying past my head. It was Pixel. She landed with a crash and let out a wail. As I bent over to pick her up, she ran past me and climbed up to the top of the aquarium rack again. She stood up there for a few seconds staring down. I turned to see what she was looking at and saw that it was the rats. They were staring up at her, all lined up. I turned back just in time to see her throw herself off the top.

I tried to pick her up but she clawed at me and started to climb again. I grabbed a towel and finally wrapped her up. I shut off the stereo and ran out of the room while the rats watched us. I called the dogs and we all spent the night in my truck. When I went back in this morning the stereo was back on and the rats were out of their cage lined up on the table like they were waiting for me. I think VeilCorp did something to them. I can’t have them here anymore. I know it sounds crazy. I still want to help, I really do, but I feel like I’m losing my mind. Can you see if anyone at VeilWatch has heard anything about this lab? Please send someone to get these rats as soon as you can! I’m scared to go back into the house.

Lahaina Officials Are Choosing Birds Over Children

I am profoundly disappointed in the Division of Forestry and Wildlife for deciding to extend the boundaries of the preservation zone and the Lahaina school board for not standing up to the eco-bullies. The decision to limit school bus routes disturbs the early morning and afternoon routines of dozens of children and their families. It’s high time that school officials understand that it’s their job to safeguard children and not birds.

Our family moved to Lahaina 5 years ago for my wife’s work and so I could pursue my passion of wave counting. At that time, the bus stop was 3 houses down. I could wake up at 7:15 am and have my daughter fed, clothed, and off to the bus on time. This allowed me a couple hours of counting on the beach before lunch and then a few hours of counting on my boat before I had to be back.

Now, I have to get up almost 20 minutes earlier so we can walk to the closest stop. Worse still, it’s in the opposite direction from the beach. I remember when it was a school’s job to take care of your kids for at least 6.5 hours a day. Back then a parent got to enjoy a whole days worth of pursuing passions, not part of a day. I’m losing almost a whole hour every day and that is not fair to me, my children, or my interests! On a normal day I could count thousands of waves if I stayed awake, now that number is less.

If that wasn’t bad enough, our morning route now leads past Ano Lee’s maker commune. To say the least it’s disgusting. As soon as you get to the bottom of the hill the smell of stale cheese snacks, burnt wires, and regret punches you in the face. I make sure that I walk between my daughter and the main shed, so she doesn’t have to see their unkept faces lit up by their glow forks while they eat breakfast.

Like many others on the island I am no fan of Lee and his Ungroomables. If the Forestry department really wants to protect wildlife they’d pull the plug on all those 3d printers. I’m sure that no animal wants to come within a mile of of that racket and the purplish-blue glow of the the chachki hut seems to attract more bugs than hikers. If we’re not careful they’ll just keep printing buildings until the whole island turns into Gatlinburg.

I’m just as committed to conservation as the next guy. I always cut the plastic rings on my cans just in case they slip off the side of the boat. If I break a bottle on the beach, I draw a little box in the sand around the area to warn people because it’s the right thing to do. At some point the board is going have to stop letting the nature lovers dictate their policies and nurture its relationship with parents. It’s time for them to do what is right. It’s with a heavy heart and sore feet that I urge officials to work together to bring back the lost bus routes.

Sincerely,
John Driscol

We Shouldn’t be Building a Radio Tower in Lahaina

I’m not sure I have the words to properly convey my disappointment at the short-sightedness and derision that I experienced last night at the radio tower meeting. It is a shame that a person can’t be forgiven for past mistakes (even if they were very well intentioned) and that nobody seemed interested in heeding my warnings.

You may not have recognized me at first, but you all seemed to remember my most famous diversion program, Thug-Hugs. All anyone wanted to talk about was the negative coverage we got, or the jokes on late night TV. What you and many others failed to understand was that the program would have been a huge success if it hadn’t been for the incident at the bus stop. The world may not have been ready for surprise hugs from formerly incarcerated strangers but it needs to hear my message about the dangers of profanity.

As an amatuer sociologist I’ve devoted my life to identifying the ills of society. That is how I became aware of the sickness of swearing brought on by extreme activities. I was trying to enjoy myself with my nephew at an amusement park but I found it impossible because of the language I was hearing. Every trip on the roller coaster burned my ears as profanity mixed with the screams and laughter. I firmly but politely informed everyone around me that I didn’t appreciate the coarse language and would call the police if it didn’t stop. Instead of solving the problem, I was surprised to find that my words fell on deaf ears. In fact, the profanity seemed to increase and the general mood turned dark. Something was making all the people around me agitated and I was determined to figure out what it was.

The bad language seemed to spread through the park and it began to have have a negative effect on my experience. I overheard a young lady say, “I think that f***ing weirdo from the roller coaster is following us around and writing down everything we say!” Soon after her boyfriend turned on me, threatening physical violence while calling me every name in the book. Then things got worse, as the confrontation made my nephew cry and he demanded that I take him home. I was dumbfounded as to how we had found ourselves in this situation. I was simply trying to study the phenomena I had experienced on the roller coaster. Now everyone was yelling and I began to feel something build up inside me. I looked my nephew in the eyes and called him an “ungrateful shit” before marching out of the park and to my car.

The silence of the ride home was illuminating to me. What had caused me to snap like that? What had caused the discord on the roller coaster? Why did the young lady and her companion become so angry when I was collecting data? What one thing did all those situations have in common? Then it hit me. It was the profanity.

I began watching as many roller coaster videos as I could. I discovered that if I listened close enough I could hear profanity in almost every one, but that was just the tip of the iceberg. I would soon discover that the amount of swearing involved in extreme sports videos was titanic. The base language used in base jumping videos was particularly bad. While there would be an occasional off-color remark in bike jumping or a scuffle between skateboarders, the profane parachuters took the problem to a whole new level. The F-bombs flew as they fell towards the ground defying trespassing laws and common decency. I wondered what might have happened if that girl at the park and her friends had been base jumpers. The thought made me shudder.

Words shape your reality, and bad words lead to bad outcomes. I could come to no other conclusion. Backed with anecdotal evidence and a small video library of examples, I went to the meeting in order to warn you. Towers lead to base jumping. Base jumping leads to profanity. Profanity leads to your sister-in-law forbidding you from seeing your nephew, or worse. Most people are blissfully unaware of the ramifications of having a tall structure erected in their town, but I’m not most people. I urge my neighbors and our community to please listen to my words of warning and halt construction of this tower before it’s too late.

DEV

New Buildings and Dangers

We made a few audio improvements to compliment all of our recent map work this week. A number of weapons now have improved clicks, twangs, and booms. We’ve added some new character sounds such as crisper footfalls, and rustling while moving through the foliage. We have placeholder voices for NPCs and our monsters as well, although they need a bit of work yet. The trophy hunter’s battle cries sound like they’re trying to decide if attacking is worth the effort, and the NPC voices are reminiscent of something you’d hear listening to an audiobook on the way to work, but we plan on upgrading both soon.

Crafting improvements continue, with a number of ui upgrades. We made a number of drag and drop improvements, and squashed a bug that was offsetting where an item ended up in your inventory. Double clicking an item now brings up its detail page so all of its info is easily accessible. We added time estimates so you know how long your new weapon or part is going to take to build, and made a number of navigation enhancements too.

We’re still working on debugging our live Veil News Network (VNN) drone feed. However, you can still watch a previously recorded stream on the front page until it’s back in the air. We’re working on drone documentation as well, and hope to have the live camera making its rounds across the island again soon.

The latest “refurbish machine” concept drawings were presented in various configurations, states of disrepair, and colors. Designed to allow players to change colors and fix torn clothing and armor, the machine should be ready to go in the near future. We talked briefly about other types of finishing, polishing, and engraving we might include down the road.

Our monsters not only got new voices this week, they got two new types as well. We have individuals with ranged attacks to deal with snipers, and players trying to kite melee fighters into a killzone. We also have individuals who can feed on downed party members, and grow considerably tougher. This makes it important for players to stay together, and keep everyone healed up. We watched a short demo movie of both new types in action, and talked a bit about future iterations.

Jesse made a number of layout improvements to help players navigate across the webpage, and we worked on trails between points of interest in the game. We’re using an automated trail building system to integrate the already existing Lahaina roads, with the network of paths we need to keep players moving around the map. We’re aging and breaking the roads as we move section by section, populating the map.

With all the road work being done, the team continues to add buildings, and structures to explore. We fixed the bugs we ran into last week with the Thorcon Power Plant and it’s back in place. Here you can see it in the midday sun.Responsive image

The Lahaina Armory found a spot on the map too. We still need to add some weathering and some ground cover, but the wooden building will be open to the public soon, offering a good selection of weapons and ammo. Below you can see the front of the building.
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That’s all for this week. We’ll be back with more updates later.